That was me

One day, i heard a girl was telling her bestfriend about what she has been through. Tears were streaming down her face, but somehow i could feel the pain the way she does.
She said "There is time when I have to let go what i never really had. As you know, my heart is breaking into pieces."

And yeah, that was me.

What's the point of letting go something you've been struggled for years? Pain. That's all I've got. I've spent 2 years for thing i thought i should've had. But I don't. I always knew that people change but memories remain forever. I don't blame you for this heart damage. Because, I bet that even the sweetest chocolate expires.

So, i decided to forget, not the people, but the feeling i have for them. All that cute stuffs I received, every photos we took, songs we sang out loud, those deepest secrets we shared, times we spent together will always be a reminder that you were real. We were real.

After your (real) leaving, i've learnt to not getting attached to someone. Why? Because when he left, you would feel lost. I can't feel anything at all.
I will never delete some pieces that you left me. I would rather ignore it and keep it safe. Yeah, I tried. But somehow I can't stand to see them all over again and it cost my heart a pain.

You're still here, still around, still talking to me like nothing happened, still walking in the same street, still going to the same place, still laughing at the same jokes, but somehow you're so far away. You're here, and you're not.

If this called love, then why does it feel so bad?

I just can't believe we end up this way. We have nothing to say to each other. Yeah, i should admit, I'm dying everytime I see you feel nothing at all. While, I'm here, staring at you with the broken pieces. It's not that I can't live without you. It's just the best thing that's ever happened to me has gone. I mustn't expect anything because it will never back.

The only thing left is being strong. It's not going to be easy, not at all. But i should find my old self back. I want my old life back, without you. Without this killing pain, of course.